The Meath Coaster

Funtasia Restaurant Review

© December 2005 issue

The Fairground Restaurant, Funtasia, Bettystown Co. Meath

041 9828301

We on the Meath coast have several national institutions. One of them is the national ecology centre, Sonairte. At the other end of the scale is the far more commercially successful Funtasia. Sometimes you will see it advertised on TV stations including MTV and Nickelodeon. Sometimes you’ll hear it on national radio stations and if you go to the cinema in Ireland, you’ll probably see it advertised there as well. So those of us with children (or a penchant for slot machines) are very fortunate to have such an excellent facility on our doorstep.

 Over the last five years, Funtasia has transformed itself from an ordinary Irish sea-side amusement arcade into a leading national family entertainment attraction. The corner of Bettystown square became an indoor and outdoor fun park. Fabulous new play areas were added to make a children’s paradise, from the five level Jungle Zone to bumper cars. Then bowling lanes were put in, followed by snooker and pool rooms. Just when you thought they were out of space, the roof was developed and magical contraptions began to take shape and move. I know all this because my seven year old and his contemporaries have made sure that we’re constant visitors to Funtasia. It is always guaranteed to put a smile on a child’s face.

 And so it was that on his seventh birthday, early on a Thursday evening in mid-November, we found ourselves in the new “Fairground” restaurant in Funtasia. To enter the restaurant, you have to walk through the wall of noise and lights that is the amusements. But once you pass those heavy polished wooden doors, you’re in a strangely peaceful oasis. The first thing we saw was a giant glass-roofed circle in the floor encasing a miniature fairground full of rides, slides, carousels and other ornaments. The children took great delight in standing on glass that wouldn’t break. Standing and then jumping just to be sure. The adults were greeted immediately and shown to a table by a side wall, where a high chair awaited the toddler and crayons and puzzle books were produced for the older children. Not only that but large plasma TVs hung from several walls with scenes of the amusements within Funtasia. The children had once seen Mr Bean on these TVs and kept waiting for it to come back on.

 So with quiet children, menus were distributed. These included two adults Early Bird menus and two children’s Fun menus. The Early Bird and main menu changes regularly but this week it offered a four course meal including deep fried Brie with tomato relish, breast of barbury duckling on sauted fennel with orange jus and homemade banoffi pie for Madame. Monsieur, remembering the excesses of New Zealand, decided to go healthier. So the fantail of galia melon with fruit coulis, followed by cod goujons and tropical fruit salad was chosen. All for €14.99 each. The voucher for the free bottle of wine from the November issue of the Meath Coaster took care of drinks.

 The children squealed in delight when they found the back page of their menus. Novelty ice-creams of the type found in the Mediterranean resorts where the cause. Both children wanted of course to proceed immediately to desserts. That not being an option, Both then chose pizza from their menu, presumably because they thought they could eat it fastest. It came in at €4.50 each while the ice-creams were €2.95. But that wasn’t all. As we wondered which mains the adults could take to share with the one year old, the waitress helpfully volunteered that there was even a “baby bowl” for the little toddler which consisted of mashed potatoes, gravy and vegetables for €2.65. This, like many things in Funtasia, is something we’d seen in America but rarely in Ireland. It was great to see so much thought about what it takes to keep children happy.

 Once the orders were taken on an electronic keypad, the children started with their crayons and puzzle books with glances up to see what was on the TV beside them. The adults had time to look around at the magnificently decorated restaurant. The décor is designed to give the impression of a large wooden carousel.  The centre of the carousel is the bar area. Brass fittings abound to show off the wood. The attention to detail in the restaurant fittings reflects so much of what makes Funtasia special. Intricate details are everywhere, it would take twenty long visits to take it all in. The wall paper and wood panelling are everywhere decorated with carousel horses of all sizes and shapes. Even the steps have little miniature toy ornaments built into them. A trip to the toilets was an experience with the decorative theme continued, plasma TVs, automatic taps and a hand dryer that could blow off a ring. There is just a bright warm glow to the whole restaurant.

 The adult starters arrived. The Brie was very tasty, the chicken tenders were fine. Both were eaten in relative peace as the children were all occupied. No sooner were the starters finished than two lovely cheese covered pizzas arrived for the children. They were soon attacked with gusto and met with approving nods and mouth filled mutters.

 Our waitress always had a smile which goes a long way and so our main course arrived. Unfortunately we both forgot to nominate from the side orders and the default chips arrived. Madame loves duck so that was an instant hit. Her portion was very generous, the meat was cooked very nicely and I think she made the better choice. The cod goujons had a lovely hint of lemon and were very nice but not quite as nice as the duck.

 The children only managed half their pizzas before the temptation of the ice-cream became to great. The toddler also couldn’t make too great a dent in his large baby bowl even though he had not ice-cream to distract him. Impatiently the birthday boy waited for the adults to hurry up. As Madame was the designated driver, I did my best to drink our bottle of wine. Normally not a problem at all but it was a little early in the evening and there were children to supervise and entertain.

 At last it was dessert time. The banoffi pie was delicious once the huge layers of whipped cream were stripped off. The tropical fruit salad was indeed very healthy. The novelty ice-creams were exactly what two little children could want. Coffees arrived. The evening wore on and things got too much for the toddler, he began to complain, loudly. While Madame picked him up and gathered various coats and things, she flustered something about the bill. I thought she said she’d paid it so I rounded up the now escaped children and shepherded them out the door after Madame and baby. As we stood outside in the noise of the amusements, the waitress arrived beside us reminding us, still with a smile, that it was customary to pay the bill. Our embarrassment was removed once €51 had been transferred.

 Of course the birthday boy then wanted to enjoy some of the other delights of Funtasia and so it was onwards to the bumper cars and some other rides. They  had happy dreams that night.

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